If you read Bill Simmons at all, you probably know that one of his ongoing jokes at present is his consistent bashing of the Minnesota Timberwolves' beleaguered GM, David Kahn. Up until last night, I never really thought he was as dumb as his reputation states. Yes, he drafted Ricky Rubio without making sure he would be willing to leave Europe, and yes, he drafted Jonny Flynn over Stephen Curry and Brandon Jennings. Dumb moves, for sure. But his comments after the NBA Draft Lottery last night that I just saw on SportsCenter have launched Mr. Kahn into the discussion for the dumbest person working in sports today.
Kahn: "This league has a habit, and I am just going to say habit, of producing some pretty incredible story lines," Kahn said. "Last year it was Abe Pollin's widow and this year it was a 14-year-old boy and the only thing we have in common is we have both been bar mitzvahed. We were done. I told Kevin: 'We're toast.' This is not happening for us and I was right."
First of all, David Kahn, you're not just disparaging the NBA with your remarks, you're disparaging Ernst and Young, only probably the most reputable major accounting firm operating in the United States today. Ernst and Young handles the lottery process, not commissioner David Stern or his cohort Adam Silver. Then you drag a teenage boy with a nerve disease down with some indecipherable remark about not having anything in common with him? Who the hell cares if you have anything in common with him? What does that have to do with anything? And do you really believe that the NBA rigged the lottery to get the number one pick to WASHINGTON? Clearly, you've never lived here. Nobody helps Washington.
I'm sure David Kahn didn't mean any ill will toward any of these people, and made his remarks out of frustration that he didn't get the number one pick. But did anyone explain to him that having the worst record only guarantees a 25 percent chance at the number one pick and only guarantees the number four pick? He's supposed to be IN CHARGE OF AN NBA TEAM! Mike Tirico and Doris Burke have a better understanding of the lottery process than this guy.
The comments might make a bit more sense if there were a clear superstar to take first in the upcoming draft. There isn't. Kahn's already passed on two point guards in Jennings and Curry (OK, not a point guard, but close enough) that are already better than Kyrie Irving will ever be. Derrick Williams had one monster game in the NCAA tournament and everyone thinks he's the next Blake Griffin. These are the consensus two best players in this draft and the Wolves are going to get one of them. Whoever the Wolves end up with, won't help them. So what difference does it make if they pick first or second? They actually are saving money by picking second.
So having logically picked apart his comment, the true reason I have a problem with it is that it naively undermines the credibility of the NBA league office right as a labor dispute is about to begin. Less informed observers (and sadly, a percentage of ESPN personalities) are going to actually believe this dreck. It's one thing if someone like Bill Simmons invents draft lottery conspiracy theories. Hell, I watched the 1985 Lottery and it looks pretty rigged. Maybe it was rigged. It was clearly a stupid way to go about operating the lottery and, accordingly, they went to an independent firm to properly manage the event. But for a working GM of a team to suggest such chicanery is highly inappropriate.
For a man in a position of authority in this league to say something this stupid calls for his immediate resignation, as he has offended the accounting community, the teenage boys with nerve diseases community, and the people with brains community. Will this blog post be the most uproar heard about this? I hope not.
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